Letter to my son on his 9th birthday

My dearest boy,

Ok, slow down dude! Seriously – 9 years old already! Sheesh – what is the big rush?! It’s like you’ve decided that the regular passage of time is a complete drag and so it needs to move hella faster for you! This annoying tendency of yours to try and defy natural laws has got to stop!

This last year has been a time of immense physical and personal growth for you and it’s been so wonderful to see you choose to do things rather than be passively dragged along to sundry activities by your parents. Activities that you then actively tried to get out off.

You picked to do Cub Scouts for the first time this year – which I suspect had a lot more to do with the socializing with your friends than any burning desire to get back to nature. And there was that one worrying moment when they asked a bunch of 8 year old boys to bring a soap, rope, and a pocket knife to the pack meeting! Not gonna lie – that had me a tad concerned!

You picked to return to soccer after retiring almost 3 years ago. Retiring – may I add – after a less than stellar debut season – when you decided to sit in the goal rather than run. That was a particular treat for Dad who was your team coach! But you actually played in all your games this time without complaining too much and even scored a goal – way to go!

You also pick your own clothes now which makes for some creative sartorial choices. So far the only thing I can tell for certain is your elaborate plan for choosing clothes involves grabbing the first item of clothing in the clean shirts category and pairing it with the first item of clothing in the clean shorts category! And can we talk a little about the hair – it is at a nondescript length between Unkempt and Guaranteed-to-Cause-Your-Dad-to-have-a-Fit! But I hate to say it – it kinda suits you! As Aditi maushi (aunt) says – all these good looks completely wasted on a boy!

You’re still really laid back and mellow – except when it comes to your sister and then, boy, do you know how to push all the right buttons! As does she – no one can get you into a frothy rage as much as Maya. But remember that this is the same girl who took one look at you as an unimpressive baby in your hospital crib and declared her love with the immortal words – “Mom, I not hit her”! She did kind of break that promise but she still loves you nonetheless and you may NOT hit her back under any circumstance!

You’re still an annoyingly picky eater especially when it comes to – oh EVERYTHING I make. So I’ve become very familiar with that moment when I’ve planned and executed a recipe beautifully. And when the dish comes out of the oven and I stare in pride at this masterpiece I’ve created. And it’s all warm and gooey and smells like the love child of a vanilla bean and a cocoa pod. And then I remember – oh that’s right – there’s no way in hell that Adam’s going to eat this!

And then there’s the intelligence with the irreverent sense of humor that is both hilarious and – at times – freakishly aggravating! An illustrative conversation that combines your analytical skills with your sassy-pantsiness follows:

Dave: Adam, when would you like dinner?

Adam: What time is it now?

Dave: It’s dinnertime!

Adam: But what does the clock say? What’s the exact time?

Dave: It’s 5:28, are you getting hungry?

Adam: I will be in 32 minutes!

Ever since you figured out subtraction with borrowing in your head you’ve been acting like a bit of a dictatorial turdball!

And I do like how you will try and figure things out on your own – it doesn’t always lead to the right answer but it gives me a fascinating glimpse into the brain behind the hair! And, I haven’t said this before, but what I see is both beautiful and terrifying at the same time – like a peacock that’s 100 feet tall…. or a Venus fly trap…. or that flower that blooms just once in 12 years and smells like a rotting carcass!

Adam: Mom, what does “my cup runneth over” mean?

Me: It’s something people say when they are beyond grateful or beyond thankful. It’s like saying I’m already very fortunate and then something else good happens.

Adam: hmmmm….it just kind of sounds selfish.

Me: What?! Selfish? Why?!

Adam: Well, – it’s like you’re saying that you already have plenty to drink and now you’re wasting the water. That it could go to someone who’s really thirsty and deserves it and instead you’re taking it and you’re not even drinking it – you’re just being selfish.

Who are you, you perceptive, deep, intuitive child. And what did you do to my nose-picking, eye-rolling, incessant-Wii-playing, sister-torturing son?! No wait, he’s got to be in there somewhere!

So happy birthday my beautiful boy! And enjoy this song from your current favorite band Fall Out Boy!

I will love you always and forever,


PS: Dad read a draft of this blog and his only comment was that he didn’t like my use of the word “hella” – he thought it was annoying. And then I asked him if he thought it was hella annoying …. Dad is losing his sense of humor in his old age – just saying!



    • Judy, thanks so much for visiting my little corner of the blogging universe! My children are great fodder and when they grow up I hope these letters will give them a chuckle! I’m going to try this new prompt generator tool – looks promising!

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