I have wonderful friends who are made of awesome and invite me out with them and put up with me despite conversations like the one below:
TR: I’m going to be shadowing a veterinarian tomorrow as part of research for my next book. (Because TR is an awesome author)
KS: That sounds exciting! I’m sure the book’s going to be great! (Because KS is so nice and supportive, it’s unreal)
SP: Who’s the guy you’re going to be shadowing? (Because SP is an engineer and wants to get to the point)
TR: He’s our vet at XYZ Veterinarian practice
Me: Is he going to be the hero, if so, you should really meet our cat’s vet! (Because I am an ego maniac and everything must revolve around me)
KS: Is he really handsome!?
Me: Kind of tall, really really pale with like light, sandy hair and really blond eyebrows – I mean the dude’s almost colorless and he’s gorgeous!
TR (with a quizzical expression): By colorless … do you mean like an albino?
SP (very slowly): Ummm… does he have red eyes? Because that’s a dead giveaway.
Me: No his eyes are like really really light blue.
KS: Gmmp gmmmmph (laughing into her water glass)
TR: Sooooo let me get this straight – what you’re saying is that your albino, colorless, pale eyed vet would make a good romantic hero?!
Me: Oh, and he’s also missing 2 or 3 fingers!!
KS: Stop, for the love of.. (has lost control by now and is crying helplessly into her napkin)
The next day, TR sends me this message: is this what you find sexy?
And while I do find Snowflake the inbred albino gorilla very sweet…. he’d be a whole lot sexier if he were missing 3 fingers!